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Marriage

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I can’t help but put this page in here because parenting and homeschooling are so connected to marriage-ing. What I mean is, my relationship to my husband, Edric, greatly influences and affects my parenting and homeschooling. I’ve written numerous articles about marriage and discovered that people seem to enjoy reading these a whole lot, too. Somehow the issues, moments of comedy, romance, and honesty of married life parallels what others experience in their own relationships. With permission from my husband, Edric, I write about our marriage.

Truthfully, I don’t always know what I am doing as a wife but when I do get it right, I know it’s is only by God’s grace! Marriage has taught me that I am limited in my capacity to love and to change for the better. Apart from the work of God in my life and Edric’s, neither of us would be happy in our marriage. But I can wholeheartedly say that after 11 years, I’m still looking forward to growing old together, serving God as a team and raising our children through the seasons to come.

My oldest son, Elijah, asked me one day, “Mom, is marriage easy?” I paused for a little bit and I said, “Marriage is not easy. It is actually difficult. But it is worth it.” He had a far-off look in his eyes like he was trying to take in what I had just said. So I followed up with the question, “Do you know what makes it difficult?” I waited for him to answer but he was waiting for me to explain so I said, “What makes it difficult is that people are not perfect. We are sinful and selfish.” I shared with him that God designed marriage to be something good and wonderful but when we don’t follow God’s design, we don’t experience marriage the way God wants us to. He understood this and he replied, “I used to think that in marriage people just love each other. Like it’s just natural. Like daddy loves you and you love daddy.”

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His fairy tale idea of marriage had just been thrown out the window, but I wanted him to understand at this very young age that without God, marriage is not a fairy tale. Marriage is not happily ever after. That’s the pin to his bubble, to everyone’s bubble. But the more encouraging reality is that marriage can be the most amazing relationship. If a husband and wife choose to fulfill their God-given roles and keep God at the center of their marriage, marriage grows sweeter through the years.

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I don’t pretend to be an expert on relationships and that’s not why I write the entries that I do. But Edric and I are very passionate about helping young couples and singles discover God’s principles for marriage. We’ve been blessed to learn about marriage from the word of God, great mentors, and our own crazy mistakes and practical discoveries. It personally delights me to know that giving people a peak into my relationship to Edric — the good and the bad stuff I’m not so proud of — makes them hope in the grace of God and who he is. It’s not about us, it’s all about HIM.

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8 thoughts on “Marriage

  1. Hi joy. I’ve read some of your blog posts and I’m happy that we share the same insights when it comes to marriage. I just want to know if you do counseling to wives like me? Thanks.

    1. Hi Guin! Right now, I do counseling through email or Facebook messaging. The reason is I guard my time with the kids because of homeschooling. So, if you have questions, please feel free to email me at joytanchimendoza@gmail.com or Facebook me – joytmendoza 🙂

  2. hi joy!

    thank God for you! Im so happy to learn about your blog. Your articles most especially on marriage have been an eye opener for me.

    Kate

  3. hi ms joy..I can see that you really have a good heart thats the reason y god never stopped to bless you nd ur family. .may god continue to bless u..i know u dont know me but if ever I have problems with marriage or anything can I seek advice from you?

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