Our children have their own timetables when it comes to their faith journeys. We can do our best to raise them in the ways of the Lord and to teach them God’s word, but at the end of the day they have to make the choice to follow God themselves. Sometimes this reality frightens me. I have to fight the fear and the worry that plague my thoughts with questions like, What if they don’t follow God? What if they fall away from the faith?
Even if Edric and I do our best to model Christianity to our children and teach them biblical truth, it’s no guarantee that they will walk the same path. We can’t force them to, either. Choosing to make Jesus their Lord and Savior is a personal thing. It’s between them and the Lord.
We share the gospel with them as soon as they can understand it, which is usually about 3 or 4 years old. However, we don’t know EVERYTHING that is going on in each of their hearts. Even though we spend loads of time with them because we are homeschooling parents, there’s a lot to them that remains unseen.
This is one of the reasons why we started taking one kid at a time on trips out of the country. Earlier in the year, we brought Elijah with us to Dubai. During our last trip to Australia and New Zealand, we took our second son, Edan. Titus will be traveling with us soon as well.
Elijah and Edan appreciated having our undivided attention when they had their turns traveling with us. In fact, Edan admitted that he enjoyed feeling like an only child! Over the two weeks that we were away with Edan, we got to know him better…
- The way he thinks – very methodical and concerned about time and details. He always wants to know what the plan is.
- His favorite things – ice cream, plants, animals, games, good books, playing the piano
- His fears – the dark, what others think of him
- What makes him feel special – time with us, words of affirmation
- His gifts – leadership, charm, bringing people together, responsibility, taking care of others
- His weaknesses – pride, impatience, easily hurt, harboring grudges
- What makes him frustrated – conflict with his siblings and blocked goals.
My favorite discovery about Edan happened in Australia, during the Hillsong Conference. Edan joined the kids’ events so he was away from us for most of the conference days. I wondered how he would cope since he was alone and outside of his comfort zone. Well, he did just fine. He made new friends and he enjoyed the services, games, and activities.
I asked him, “What did you learn during Kidsong?”
He was quiet at first (typical Edan) as he processed what he was about to say, and then he replied, “I realized I shouldn’t be ashamed to praise God…like raising my hands when I sing to him and singing with all my heart. I shouldn’t worry about what people think because I should be focused on worshiping God.”
Of coursed I teared as he told me this. Anytime my kids talk about their spiritual lives, I get emotional. It’s the most important aspect of who they are, and I feel so happy every time they trust me enough to tell me about their triumphs and struggles in the faith.
A few weeks after our trip, Edan also told me that he encountered Jesus in a special way during one of our Sunday services. He began by stammering, “I don’t know how to explain it, mom. Something happened. I was sitting in church and I felt God’s presence. I gave my life to Him again. It’s like I really understood what it meant to be a sinner, and that Jesus died on the cross for me, to save me.”
I was so excited, I grabbed him and pulled him close holding him in my arms as we both cried tears of joy. I said several times, “I am so happy, Edan!”
My greatest joy as a mother is knowing that my children love God and want to please God. Someday they will be on their own to make choices without Edric and I around. My prayer is that they will find God and discover how much He loves them, that they will give their lives to Him not because we ask them to, but because they wholeheartedly desire to.
The comforting news is this: God is the one who finds our kids. He seeks them out one by one and reveals Himself to them. As parents, we need to do our part to condition our children’s hearts to be receptive to God when this encounter happens. This involves modeling a love for the Lord, being intentional about discipling them, and providing an environment that encourages them to seek after Him. However, it gives me peace knowing that God loves them more than I ever will. He is more concerned about their relationship with Him that I will ever be.
Therefore, I need to relax as His divine work takes place in their hearts. I can’t control my kids decisions when it comes to choosing to give their lives to Him, but God is in control. He is faithful. He is present. He is moving. He is speaking to our children.
Let’s pray that they will hear Him. Let’s pray they will see Him. Let’s pray that they will choose Him!
“I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth.” 3 John 1:4
So blessed upon reading this! There was a sense of peace since I do have that feelings also that what if my children will not follow the Lord, what if they choose to do their own way, etc. But, praise God, it is He who works in the hearts of our children. We are merely stewards. I hope my husband and I may be found faithful stewards to them.
Thank God for your life Ms. Joy. God uses your life, your blog and your family to teach us spiritual truths and insights especially in parenting, relationships and life in general. God bless you and your family!
And if I may apply this to my self-centered self… God finds me. God finds us in our own peculiar worlds. Sometimes, we feel alone, unnoticed, a tiny speck in a vast universe. It is the knowledge that our worth is based not on what we have, not on who we are, but in our identity in Christ. God found me, finds me and meets me in my aloneness. And when this sinks in so deeply, I remember once again, that being found by Him, being under His watchful eye is what matters most. Thank you for this post!
As much as i pray for my children, ages 26 and 20, i have to pray for myself too. I worry too much for my kids. It’s really my daily fear that they will not have a personal encounter with God. Thank you for the post, it’s for parents like me and i pray that I can be blessed with wisdom on parenting. Many times my fear increases when i see parents who are good in bringing their kids closer to God.