Three Household Helps Gone in a Day

We lost three household helps the day after I got back from Dubai. Oh wow, that’s today! I was so looking forward to getting a break from our exhausting trip, but then I was told, one by one, that they were leaving. They all had valid reasons.

At first, I was disappointed because we let them have a “break” while we were away (the kids stayed with my parents and Edric’s parents for 8 out of the 11 days), and I previously extended days off to them while we were around. I felt taken advantage of somehow, even though I am sure that wasn’t their intention.

Of course, they need to move on to what’s better for them. (At least Caylee’s nanny is still around. That’s a big blessing! She’s worth three people to me!)

As for the three others, sigh…the timing was so inopportune. Edric and I have a crazy schedule with the road shows. We are only half-way through them. There’s a lot going on at this point in time, and I am still not at my optimum because of my health. Our household just recovered from chicken pox, too.

I was tempted to act cold towards them but God did a left hook on me and reminded me, “Have you shared the gospel with them?”

I actually hadn’t. I had put it off. And I was like, maybe I won’t anymore. Do I really have to? Their leaving was about to inconvenience me.

That inner prodding…”What?! Do you think this is the evil one telling you to share the gospel?! Of course you should share! You better share. That’s why they were in your life. What’s more important? Your convenience and comfort or their souls?!”

The answer was obvious of course. How selfish could I be?!

So I sat them down while making the kids pizzas, and told them, “Before you leave, there is something I want to talk to you about…”

They probably thought I was going to lecture them but I went through the gospel message, shared my own testimony, and led them in prayer at the end. I also showed them how to use a Bible app to grow in their faith. They willingly and happily prayed with me, and they understood what it meant to make Christ Lord and Savior of their lives.

My kids walked in on us as I came to the end of the gospel sharing. They just sat and watched. I saw their big smiles because they knew what I was doing. It mattered to them.

Afterwards, I also added with a big smile on my face, “Kids, let’s go shopping for cleaning supplies for each of you. You will be cleaning your rooms and toilets, as well as the second floor starting tomorrow!”

They were actually excited!

I am excited, too. Gosh, I don’t know why! I should be stressed. I am a little stressed because the reality of laundry for seven, cooking, cleaning, yard work, taking care of a newborn, homeschooling, pet-feeding, etc, hasn’t quite dawned on me yet. Let’s see what happens tomorrow!

However, I am confident that God will replace the persons I have lost, or give me supernatural capacity to get everything done. I am sure it’s going to be a little crazy for a while, but the kids and I will come out of this experience with greater character, with renewed dependence on the Lord. Maybe this will force Edric and I go slow down? Hmm…is that possible?!

I also think that at some point, household help in the Philippines is not going to be plausible anymore. It’s getting less and less of an option for many since good people are hard to find and most of the younger ones don’t stay long. Maybe that’s a positive thing, too. We can be so spoiled in the Philippines. I think abut my sister and her husband in the U.S. who have to do everything themselves, as well as parent four kids. Then I tell myself, You still have it so easy, Joy! Be thankful! You can still stretch yourself!

In the meantime, for those of us who do have household help, we need to remember that they are in our lives so that we can connect them to the Lord, by our testimonies, by sharing the gospel to them, and by mentoring them. When that’s our focus, we are less likely to be frustrated with them when they leave or underperform because we recognize the greater reason they are in our lives. Yes, we pay them to work for us, but God also brings them to us so that they will come to know him as Lord and Savior.

12 thoughts on “Three Household Helps Gone in a Day

  1. Hi Joy!
    This must be quite overwhelming for you now but I pray that God will sustain you with his strength. I also pray that He’ll provide the helpers you need. I’m excited what God is going to do with your situation knowing that he cares for you.
    I’m so blessed you that you were able to share the gospel to them before they eventually left. May God bless them.
    God bless you and your family.

  2. Three house helpers leaving in one day is the same as losing 3 workers in a corporate setting. The decision making did not happen overnight. I would look at where did my leadership fall short and how can I avoid the same mishap going forward.

  3. At least your 3 helpers told you they were leaving, my baby’s yaya from a certain agency (almost a month with us) took a day off and never came back haha! God really has plans. I didn’t understand at first, but now I know God wanted me to be a hands on mom to my baby.. It’s such a blessing! Im enjoying my 4month old baby 24/7 ❤️😊

  4. Hi Joy!
    I have a relative that might be a good fit. Although, she is on the move to leave for Hongkong in May, perhaps she’s better off staying in the country and work for you instead 😊. Just email me if you are interested.

  5. Being in Australia, there’s no such thing as helpers. It’s hard to even pay for daycare fees or have the time off. I have 2 little ones- 3.4yrs and 1.5yrs and one due mid July. I also have 3 embryos left to give them a chance so possibly if the Lord wills them to live, I may have 6 children. I am excited if this is God’s plan for my husband and I. However, it has been tough so far with my husband being away at times mostly Mon-Fri, so it’s just me. To even think for this to continue with more kids and to handle it all has been dawning on me and also my husband.
    However, we continue to pray and seek God in our situation and we have to depend on Him daily for strength. To also trust in Him that He will help my husband have a job where he stays and this is in a time where jobs are hard to get. It’s just a blessing that he even has one now and at least home for the weekends, whereas previously he was fly in and out 3 weeks out and 1wk off at home for almost a year.

    I even pray, “Lord, isn’t it better that my husband is with me and the family? Isn’t there a job you can provide for him that allows him to be home everyday? We trust that you will provide and we know you are sovereign with a plan to bring us through this stronger and better”. In our hearts we want to serve you together and this was the intention and our dream when we first got married, but how different things turned around to what we had imagined.

    I serve and minister to young adults and it is hard when I feel alone at times and overwhelmed, but God is greater than all our sufferings, trials or hardships and we must continue to be patient in affliction and faithful in prayer (Romans 12:12-20). To keep trusting in Him because we know in Romans 8:28 that He will bring all of this for our good. God’s good is nothing compared to what we can think good is- and His good is GOOD. We just have to obey and trust Him even if things don’t make sense.

    God bless you Joy and your family, continue to look to Christ as He has brought you out of so much and blessed you abundantly. As you continue to be used as an instrument for His glory, may He bless you and family even more.

  6. Rejoicing in the midst of a storm…Thanks for this 🙂 I always admire Mothers because they are all time superheroes 🙂 Stay blessed

  7. You are indeed given wisdom by God in the situation you’re in now. Enjoy your time with the kids in giving them responsibilities to do chores at home. I’ll pray that you may find good and trustworthy helpers that God has planned for you and your family.

  8. It’s just means one thing you need to be a real mother to your kids. How could you teach homeschooling when you yourself didn’t actually follow your own teaching. I heard you say in one of your interviews that one parent must stay at home to teach kids but apparently you were not there most of the time because you prioritize earning more money and over your kids. You can never really serve two masters at a time. You were also out of the country for too long and now you brag a lot that you hadn’t taken a break yet. Motherhood is really a tiring job but not for you because you always have helpers that makes your life easier. Haven’t it crossed your mind that was a blessing in disguise for you take charged of your whole household. I don’t wanna trust a stranger over my family’s needs. A helper might steal not only your belongings but the heart of the people you truly love.

    1. Can you please tell me what a real mother is? I’m very curious to hear it. Every family is different and blessed differently. I don’t know if you realise it but you come across as a bit angry and judgmental. Joy knows what’s best for her family and you know what’s best for yours. You shouldn’t try to put your ideas of motherhood on someone else. It is neither helpful or encouraging. I’m not trying to attack but rather encourage you to think about your words. You should choose to encourage rather then discourage.

  9. Praying for supernatural strength and extra grace for you and the entire family. Interesting how these people were brought to your household simply to see Jesus.

    Glad you and the family came to visit Negrolast time.


  10. I know how you feel.

    I also lost my yaya last December 2018 after I generously gave her Christmas gift, free transpo to and fro the province, and a free paid vacation to her hometown. She didn’t even have a decency to come back or tell me she was not going to return despite telling me and my daughter prior to her departure that she loves us. I felt duped. It was disappointing.

    I prayed that God has a better plan for us. That maybe this wasn’t the right one for us in our daughter’s next phase of life. After some frustrating searching, I found Aeva’s current yaya. She is a little more educated than the previous one and teaches my 3-year old some English on the side. So all ended well. We would never have found our current if our old yaya didn’t leave.

    Hope you found the right replacements for you soon!

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