I was sitting across from Elijah while he finished his curry and noodles over lunch. He said, “My eyesight is getting worse. I can hardly read without my glasses on.” About a year ago, he could take his glasses off and read something that was 12 to 24 inches away. But not anymore. Of course it troubles him. It troubles me, too.
When he watched “Heaven is For Real” with my dad a few weeks ago, he told me, “Mom, I was so happy to know that in heaven no one is wearing glasses!” He is definitely looking forward to perfect vision in eternity.
It’s always hard for me as a mom to watch my children struggle through life’s disappointments. I can’t help his eyes get better, at least not yet. There’s the option of laser surgery when he turns 21 but he’s got many more years to go until then. And we were told that his eyes could get really bad when he goes through puberty. Sigh. We shall cross that bridge when we get there.
For now, what encourages me is Elijah’s faith and walk with the Lord. He lives with an unfulfilled longing — to have better eyesight. But he has the right perspective. He has turned that longing over to the Lord.
After we talked about his eyes, he added, “I have three prayers that I always pray…the first is that I will always love God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. The second is that we will all go to heaven at the same time. Third is that my eyes will be healed.” (I suppressed a tear! I am such a crybaby mom.)
Elijah may only be 11 years old, but his relationship with God teaches me how to have faith. He went on to say, “Only God can answer these prayers.”
It’s moments like these, during casual, random conversations with my children that I really get a glimpse into what’s going on in their hearts. I was blessed to know that loving God was number one for Elijah. That’s number one on my prayer list for all my kids, too. If God should grant that Elijah stays faithful to him all the days of his life, it would be my greatest joy as a mother. Whether we are raptured together or his eyes are restored completely, these things are secondary to the first of his prayers. If he loves God with all that he is, he already has heaven and he already has his sight.
In the meantime, as a mom, I keep hoping in God’s goodness and plan for Elijah’s life. The same goes for all my children. There are times when I know that God is doing something in the life of my child or children and I must stand aside. I watch as their faith is tested and purified in God’s refiner’s fire. Sometimes it is hard to watch. But each of my children must come to that point in their lives where they choose to follow God. I cannot choose for them. They must have a personal encounter with Him and His love, grace and forgiveness. I cannot experience these things for them.
However, Edric and I have to be present and available so we can be privy to what’s happening in their innermost persons. And then our job is to provide the environment and example, to teach the truth that leads our children to Him, and to pray earnestly and habitually for them. The rest of their life stories…especially the circumstances, trials, and challenges that will come their way, we have to surrender to the Lord and trust that he is control. He has a master plan for calling our children to Himself. If Edric and I do our part, then we can rest in that assurance.
I hugged Elijah yesterday when he was getting emotional about his eyes again. And he let me hold him. Sometimes I think that he is very mature in a lot of ways because he acts older for his age. But at that moment he was still a child and he needed a hug from mom. I asked him if it still mattered that he got hugs from me. And he said, “Mom, of course, if I go blind (his worst fear), that’s the only thing I will feel.” Oh okay. Kind of dramatic but what a totally sweet thing to say! Thank you Lord for these precious years…
6 thoughts on “From the Heart the Mouth Speaks”
Hi Joy! I’ve been following your blog since it started & rarely comment but this post moved me. My heart goes out to Elijah because I also have bad eyes. 🙁 I started wearing glasses when I was 5 years old… had to shift to contact lenses at 8. I also remember asking my Dad at the age of 11 if I was going to blind. God was faithful and we didn’t reach that point even if my grade is at 800 today. Having rigid gas permeable lenses really helped stabilize my grade, though.
Will pray for Elijah and that his eyes get better. 🙂 I’m blessed by his courage and faith in the Lord!
Thank you for this! I decided to also dedicate my son to God, He is in charge. All worries i give to Jesus’ hands.
When i was able to buy Heaven is for Real, i read it in one sitting. How beautiful God is! How wise that He can make a little boy understand many things about Him. 🙂 Make God bless you all always!
I am sorry to hear about your eyes. I will pray for you. I will pray that when the time is right, your eyes will see as clearly as your heart already does. Please continue to be a good kuya to your siblings. I wish I had a kuya like you to guide and defend me when I was growing up. 🙂 Cheer up. One day you will be 21 and you shall have that laser procedure.
I share the same fear as you. I am already 32 years old but you surely handled it better than me.
3 weeks ago, I too noticed that I couldn’t read that clearly without my glasses. I panicked. My future husband had to bring me to the doctor because I was calling my parents and announcing to them that I am going blind.
You are so brave!
Dear sister Joy,
I am Nancy, a Filipina currently living here in Jeddah, KSA. I am a regular reader of your nice messages about family life. It has lots of lessons to learn as parents and as husbands and wives.
You have a loving and intelligent son, Elijah. I want to share with you these fresh juices for him to drink, for his eyes. I’ve shared this too with my daughter when she was a student. And this has made her eyesight well.
I’ve taken this from a book, “Fresh Vegetable and Fruit Juices by Dr. Norman W. Walker D. Sc., given to me by an American friend.
If you have a fruit & vegetable juicer, extract fresh, raw carrot juice- 16 oz or one pint, and let Elijah drink it right after extraction. It should not be stored. Second mixture: Carrot juice-13 oz. & Endive(Escarole)-3 oz. Third Mixture: Carrot-7 oz. + celery-5 oz + Endive (Escarole)-2 oz + parsley-2 oz. Fourth mixture: carrot-10 oz & spinach leaves juice-6 oz. He may drink one pint of the carrot juice before breakfast and the second mixture in the afternoon after school, before dinner. The third and fourth mix on the second day. Then repeat the first set of juices and so on… He must eat only raw vegetables and fruits. Concentrated starches or sugar foods must be omitted from his diet. His lack of proper nourishment to the optic nerves and muscles will be benefited by these live enzymes from these fresh vegetables.
After three months of daily drinking these juices, or less than one year’s time, he will improve his eyesight.
May God bless your ministry.
Sister Nancy Vicera Cabaluna
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